Here a Scam, There a Scam
On those nights when the brain refuses to shut down I find myself curled up on the futon with a good book, cup of tea and the cats. I also put on the TV as white noise.
Do you know what’s on at that time of the night/morning? Infomercials! Lots and lots of infomercials. And while some of them are really quite innocent and even entertaining, there are others that are such blatant ‘truth-by-omission’ shows, that I find myself saying ugly things to the TV screen.
Today oh gentlewomen, we’re going to talk about the ones that truly irk me to no end - the instant slimming foundation garments. Nothing is as flattering as a well-fit garment, and you need well-fitting foundation under-garments to help achieve that… but that isn’t what appears to be happening in these situations.
I am going to go into more detail on what constitutes a good fitting garment in another column, today, I feel the urge to vent.
Way Back When
Looking back in history women have always been shoved into forms that were suppose to make us look better. Please note it wasn’t to make us look better for us, but for someone else. The more debilitated the woman was by her wardrobe the higher in standing she was seen to be, the greater her authority and her appeal. More beautiful by extreme impairment - how warped is that?
- Leather and Iron Corsets
- Whale Bone Corsets - it could have as many as 40 bones in it
- Wooden Curved Busk Corsets - pushed everything to the tummy area
- Straight Busk Corsets - these put pressure over the kidneys
- Girdles - industrial strength girdles
- Pause for the 60’s & 70’s when complete freedom took over - not always a good thing
- Shaping Garments - no bones, just heavy duty elastic materials
Today’s Tricks
The Infomercials I’ve watched all tout their products as the solution to badly fitting clothing. Wrong!
First they bring out these women of different ages, and shapes all carrying more pounds then they should; in some cases a lot more then is healthy. To a person, the clothing they are wearing is at least 1-size too small - I’d lay odds on some of it being 2-sizes too small. In addition many of the styles and fabrics are vastly unsuited to the wearers body shape. Clingy knits, skimpy pants, and form-fitting tops, hard to image more ill-suited choices.
When quizzed on what they’d like changed the answers are always:
- The rolls around my waist/waistband
- The rolls around my bra
- The flab on my back
- The bulging tummy
- The panty lines (under my skin tight white unlined pants!)
The host of the program hands the victi.. I mean guest, a ’shaper’ to put on. The woman is about a size 22, the full body shaper (made out of some miracle stretch material) is about 8″ across. Yeah, just image trying to wiggle into that thing. But before she’s allowed to go, they take measurements!
So how many of you would go on national TV and have your measurements broadcast to the world? Me neither!
Time passes and the woman returns thrilled with her new look. Now those way-too-small clothes fit more comfortably. They’re still the wrong style, but they no long look like they’re going to rip completely apart with the slightest movement. Of course I don’t know how many of them even can move - I’m not exaggerating to say the term ’stuffed sausage’ comes to mind.
Another question: Would you wear a shoulder-to-knee ’shaper’ under your jeans and top? Aren’t jeans suppose to be comfortable?
I know I sound positively demented but - work with me for a moment - wouldn’t it make more sense to:
- Buy or make clothing that fits your size (not size number - size)
- Wear the correct styles to flatter your shape
- Question why you have this extra stuff on your body, and then maybe do something about getting rid of some - or all of it, permanently
These shows are a prime example of preying on a womans insecurities and promising a quick-fix that doesn’t work.
Want to learn more about Infomercial Scams? Here’s the best site on the net for that - as the consumers posts the reviews “Infomerical Scams“. Need to firm up, drop a few pounds, or just feel good about yourself again, try Leslie Sansone’s walking programs; you can get them on eBay too. Or use Netflix to try them out first!
I feel better now.
